In case you were wondering…

If you were wondering, like I was, how much we would each receive if the government took the $700 billion they gave to the banks for the “bail-out” plan, and divided it up among all of America (300 million people). Here is the answer: we would each receive $2,333.

This number might seem big to some since we are talking about every single person in the country receiving $2300, but it was actually small to me. I was thinking it was going to be in at least the ten’s of thousands. I guess in that case it is better to give it to the banks to get things back in order (hopefully) and not to me to spend $2333 on shoes and cat toys.

You would disagree, wouldn’t you Ripley?

Things I am really bad at saying:

“I don’t know how to do it.”

“I don’t know where that is.”

“I don’t know the answer.”

“No, I don’t want pancakes.”

“I feel peaceful and content.”

“I am not worried.”

“No, I won’t be able to make it.”

“That is their problem.”

“Yes, I do mind.”

“I don’t have time to do that.”

“I can’t do this on my own.”

“No.”

The Season of Spring

This Friday night I am participating in our church’s Woman’s Ministry on the topic of “What Season Are You In?” By age: Spring (18-30) Summer (30-45) Fall (45-60) Winter (60+). I am the representative for SPRING and was asked (by my Mama) to write a Bio explaining what this Season in my life is like.

Here it is for you to read:

Bio: My name is Kate Groeneman, I am 24 years old. I live with my husband Dustin, who I just celebrated 4 years of marriage with, and our cat Ripley.  I am certainly in the midst of a SPRING season where everything is quite new, exciting and a bit scary. I have come to a place in my life where the wandering from place to place and job to job has become less appealing and the need for consistency has become very important to me. God has blessed me with the job of being the Assistant Children’s Pastor here at ORCC and for the first time I desire to stay where I am planted and grow. This is just one area of many little seedlings I see growing in my life.  My husband and I have also begun to feel a tugging on our hearts for kids which is a seed that has begun to grow in both of us and I am excited for all that it would bring to our life together.

Greatest challenge of this time: I am officially an adult and treated as one, yet I feel more like a little girl than ever, very naive and uncertain about decisions. I desire to have the wisdom and poise of a woman in her 50’s, it makes me feel so far from the place that I would like to be in my walk with God, and as a wife and as a pastor.

Greatest Blessing: I have so much hope in everything ahead of me. I feel that I am finally at a place in my life that I can appreciate the challenges and respect the process of refining, finding joy in the road that I am traveling having confidence in the plan that God has for me.

What season are you in? What is your greatest Struggle? What is your greatest Blessing?

To all the girls: come to our Girls Night Out, this Friday @ 6:30!

My first tornado!!!

This is a picture of the tornado that me, my mom and Dustin all saw Sunday.

I have always wanted to see a tornado in person…at a safe distance, this one was out in a field about 4 or 5 miles away. My mom and I sat in our car and were freaking out. I even called 9 news to be an informer, to which they replied, “yeah we all ready know.” We also saw another tornado forming over Parker, but we had to go eat Pho.

Don’t even get me started on Pho.

someone explain to me…

I would like to know why every time I drive by a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (on the weekdays) there are no cars in the parking lot. Why is it that no one is ever there outside the 5 hours on Sunday that all the minivans fill the parking lot? Don’t they need to be at the church to plan services or events? I thought they had like dances all the time, when are they planning these? Shouldn’t there be someone there to clean the bathrooms and vacuum the temple? Where is everyone Monday-Friday? I wonder if they go to some secret underground lier where they plot and plan their worship service. Seriously, where are all the bishops and admins all week long? Someone please tell me.

See? No cars anywhere. What the heck??

My Plan

I typed with my toes

hi mhyu ftoes erd r calleeds lm eeteaarsSAN IKNRE DRFGHSGASVHJFDCB cap;sa locxd,lk olfdfdcx>>

see pic bvdeselow:

To the only boy who could tame me.

Today me and Dustin are celebrating 4 years of being married and 5 years of being in love. I came in to my office this morning to find a huge, amazing bouquet of sunflowers, a CD he made for me, and a card that he made with “The Little Prince” on it. ( when I met Dustin in England we read The Little Prince to each other every night before we went to bed) I have the best husband ever. I don’t deserve all the love he gives me.

For Dustin:

The Fox and the Little Prince

it was then that the fox appeared.
"good morning" said the fox.

"good morning"
the little prince responded politely
altho when he turned around he saw nothing.

"I am right here" the voice said, "under the apple
tree."

"who are you?" asked the little prince, and added,

"You are very pretty to look at."

"I am a fox", the fox said.

"Come and play with me,"
proposed the little prince, "I am so unhappy."

"I cannot play with you," the fox said,
"I am not tamed."

"AH please excuse me,"said the little prince.
But after some thought, he added:
"what does that mean---'tame'?"

"you do not live here," said the fox,
"what is it you are looking for?"

"I am looking for men," said the little prince.
"What does that mean---tame?"

"Men,"said the fox,
"they have guns, and they hunt.
It is very disturbing.
They also raise chickens.
These are their only interests.
Are you looking for chickens?"

"No," said the little prince.
"I am looking for friends.
What does that mean---tame?"

"It is an act too often neglected,"
said the fox.
"It means to establish ties."

"To establish ties?"

"Just that," said the fox.
"to me, you are still nothing more than
a little boy who is just like
a hundred thousand other little boys.
And I have no need of you.
And you, on your part, have no need of me.
To you I am nothing more
than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes.
But if you tame me, then we shall need each other.
To me, you will be unique in all the world.
To you, I shall be unique in all the world. . ."

"I am beginning to understand,"
said the little prince.

"My life is very monotonous," he said.
"I hunt chickens; men hunt me.
All chickens are just alike,
and all the men are just alike.
And in consequence, I am a little bored.
But if you tame me,
it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life.
I shall know the sound of a step that will be
different from all the others.
Other steps send me hurrying back
underneath the ground.
Yours will call me, like music out of my burrow.
And then look:
you see the grain-fields down yonder?
I do not eat bread.
Wheat is of no use to me.
The wheat fields have nothing to say to me.
And that is sad.
But you have hair that is the color of gold.
Think how wonderful that will be
when you have tamed me!
The grain, which is also golden,
will bring me back the thought of you.
And I shall love to listen
to the wind in the wheat. . ."

Here’s to 5 years of love and the hundreds more to come.

all right, all right calm down

Life has been a bit busy lately, and is only going to be even more so since this weekend we are speaking at Rez’s JR HIGH CAMP!! and then I am going to Florida (sans Dustin) for a fun girls week with 2 of my best friends. What is funny is that I am going all the way to Florida for an awesome trip but all I keep thinking about it how I will be missing out on the weekly IHOP sesh, which are totes presh.

A couple things I am excited about:

1. Cars Night in Kid’s Church. Pictures of cute kids in pimped out rides to follow.

This is my car-specially made by Kate, Dustin, Mark and Judi.

2. The possibility of swimming with a manatee in Florida.

3. My new ring from the antique store that Mark and Judi took us to on Saturday.

4. Business cards with my name on them. First ever.

5. July 30th (4 year anniversary)

6. making lists.

7. the fact that you are reading this list.

8. having 854 hits on Friday, making 12,612 hits total!!!

Things I am not excited about:

1. Having 12,612 hits on my silly blog with nothing worth while for people to read.

2. Having only 8 things on the list of things I am excited about. Lists should stop at a nice, round number like 5 or 10.

3. Being at work this morning at 6:50AM and now it is only 9:16AM and it feels like it should be noon by now.

4. The possibility of swimming with alligators in Florida.

P.S.-I just like putting “for the love of picard” in my categories. It adds a little something, I think.

let’s get serious for a second, here.

I noticed that I have been avoiding writing anything too serious or personal on my blog. I have sat down a couple times to write something deeper than the usual silliness, only to find that I get uncertain and suffice to say I have about 15 “drafts” that have never been finished or published.

I know so many people who can open up on their blogs and share precious things from their heart, making themselves vulnerable for the sake of healing, growing and ministering to others. I have nothing but awe and respect for those people. It takes guts to share such raw truth with others especially so publicly on the internet. And this is the very reason that I hesitate to share my heart too much. Once it is published it is out there for all to read, judge, and fashion their own opinions of who you are. That is scary.

I have had some things that I wanted to share and decided that having a fear of being honest is a problem that I don’t want to partake in anymore. I want to be brave like Judi, or Teresa. Not to share for the sake of sharing, but so that hopefully someone will benefit and grow.

Here goes it:

#1) I am currently attending a 12 step group called Celebrate Recovery every Monday night. It is intense and challenging. I have seen things in myself that are troubling and realize how truly powerless I am when it comes to the compulsive behaviors in my life. I thought that I could change myself with enough determination, but it turns out I have zero self control, and most of the time when I am given “a way out” of the temptation I don’t take it anyway. I see things that started as a tiny shoot years ago and have grown to be a poisonous force in my heart directing my thoughts, actions and even my beliefs about God. Scary. I am not going to act like going to CR is just as easy as attending some small group or something. Every Monday night I look for reasons not to go, every Monday I struggle with my downfalls worse than any other day, every Monday I tell myself I don’t really need to go to some group and tell total strangers about the deepest parts of my life. Every Monday I am more tired than any other day after work. Every Monday Dustin encourages me to go to CR and every Monday Teresa meets me there and supports me in it. Every Monday I leave CR a different person, better when I arrived and full of hope.

#2) I have really been struggling with trusting people recently. I think a big part of that is because I currently underwent a job change and now carry the title “Pastor” with me everywhere I go. I also think it is because I have been going through a realization of my imperfections in such an intense and hard way and it has made me shrink away from being the normally very open and honest person that I am. Now put those 2 things together Pastor+struggles=fear of being found out.

#3) I was told it would be very hard for me to get pregnant. I have been really ashamed to tell anyone about this, only a few people really know. I feel like it is a weakness in me as a women or something. I feel like there are girls who blink and get pregnant, they are not even necessarily wanting to have kids yet. Then I know girls who have amazing marriages, solid foundations and would be amazing moms and are struggling to get pregnant. I just don’t understand at all. I keep coming back to something Pastor Sarah told me, that everyone’s lives have a timeline and when God gives us a child it will be one his/her timeline is destined to begin, the friends they will have, the spouse they will find, the teachers, pastors and mentors that will enter their life, the adventures they will experience, all these things will line up at the time they are meant to. When I think of the enormous responsibility of that-of a LIFE beginning-it makes it a little easier to know it is not in my hands.

Well if you read all that, I congratulate you.