Category Archives: i am feeling feisty.

Jesus is not Ghandi


Last Thursday Dustin and I saw David Bazan perform a “house show” at our friend Josh’s place. There was about 50 of us nicely packed into the living room where Bazan strummed his guitar and played a great acoustic set that even included some classic Pedro the Lion songs.

Bazan always has a question and answer time at his shows. Dustin saw him a few years back and was really struck by some of the answers he gave. So I was really interested when someone asked him if he believed in an afterlife. I’m not going to write out the whole reply because I don’t remember it accurately enough to do it justice and also I’m a blogger not a reporter. But there was one part that stuck out to me- Bazan said that he is no longer afraid of death and hell. He said he has come to realize that hell is something that some mean people made up as a threat. (He didn’t talk about heaven so I don’t know if he feels that it is something nice people made up or not.) After stating some disgust at the state of the Evangelical church he went on to say that he would just like to see people follow what Jesus taught. There were supportive “yeahs” and light clapping around the room.

I’m not trying to single out Bazan, but he is a good example of a common theology among our culture. It has become popular to see Jesus as a sort of Ghandi figure, quoting the couple of verses that fit their personal idea of who Jesus is- love your neighbor as yourself, take care of the widows and the poor, turn the other cheek, ect.

I find that they often leave out the parts where Jesus talks about the divisive things: the kingdom of Heaven advancing by force, worshipping God and serving only Him, how Jesus will turn people away from heaven, how real hell is and how many will end up there, and don’t even get me started on the parts where Jesus starts predicting the future and talks about a final judgement. These are not the things that you hear when people reference how great Jesus was-WAS-and how we should all follow his example.

People think of Jesus as some really great guy who taught us how to live in love and peace with humanity. The ultimate hippie. That is partly true, in a very pathetic, watered down way. Jesus didn’t see himself that way. He said: “Don’t imagine that I came to bring peace on the earth! No, I came to bring a sword.” Surprised? Read Matt 10:34-39.

Is this the Jesus that you know? If it’s not then it’s time to open a Bible and read who it is you claim to know and follow.



Filed under aiming at heaven, church stuff, currently reading/listening to, groupies, i am feeling feisty., in my opionation, life questions, more like Him, my friends., right?, stuff I don't like

Love it or Hate it?

There are certain movies you either love or hate. People get pretty passionate and fired up about these movies, and I am one of those people.

Here are 3 movies I have chosen that seem to really divide people in taste:

1. M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village


I love this movie. M. Night Shyamalan started off so strong with The Sixth Sense. It is by far his greatest movie. Then there was Unbreakable which I thought was great. The Village is his third movie and may not be as strong as his first two. Which seems to be a pattern because they just keep going downhill- anyone see The Happening? Yuck. I chose The Village as the movie I love because I know so many people who hate it. The story has so much thought and depth, and the cast of  Bryce Dallas Howard, Joaquin Phoenix, and Adrien Brody is incredible. I felt like the love story is sincere enough where you understand her need to go through danger and find help. The very thing that people find stupid about the movie- the fake monsters- is the thing that I learned the most from. It is an accurate analogy of how we are kept in fear by lies that end up running our lives. Maybe I am getting too deep with it, but that is what I got out of it.

2. Sophia Coppola’s Lost In Translation


I love this movie. Sophia Coppola may have ruined the Godfather III, but she has gone on to make some of the most amazing movies. Lost in Translation is the follow up to her first film The Virgin Suicides, which I also love. This movie was able to capture that feeling of being isolated and lonely  exploring a foreign country and the cultural shock that comes with it. The first scene of traveling through Tokyo at night is so captivating. You really feel like you have been in Japan for 2 hours.  One of my favorite scenes is where Scarlett Johannson’s character, Charlotte, goes on a day-trip to a visit a Buddhist temple outside Tokyo.  She experiences so much but feels so alone in it. I had a similar experience when I was in Amsterdam and this may be why I relate to the feel of movie so much.

Besides it capturing all the emotions of traveling, it also has Bill Murray. Enough said.

3. The Notebook


I hated The Notebook. Some people (girls) are going to be so sad that I am saying this, but it’s my blog and I can say what I want. I am not much of a chick flick person, unless it involves Romy and/or Michelle. I think the movie itself was really beautiful, the little town in North Carolina set in WW2, but the story of a rich girl falling for the poor, country boy is not a new idea. I can’t stand movies where they are pulling every heart string to get you to cry. The first 20 minutes of the movie was so bad that I honestly don’t remember the rest except the part where they both die at the same time. A sweet idea, but waaayyy too sappy for me. You might think I must have a heart of stone, but I just don’t like being manipulated into feeling sad to the point of tears over something so sappy, and this movie is shameless in doing just that. Sure I liked the scenes of a nice summer romance- ice cream, canoe on a lake, cabin in the woods. I am still a girl after all. I just don’t like how far they push the sentimental.

Those 3 movies are the only ones I could think of for today.I usually don’t do the whole leading question that begs for comments, but  this time feel free to agree/disagree, add some of your own that you love or hate. I am curious to see what people think.


Filed under i am feeling feisty., in my opionation, right?, stuff I don't like

Attention All Church Shoppers

I had a fabulous facebook chat with my friend Josh today. We were talking about the current trends we see in some friends relating to church. There are a few things that we noticed, and maybe I will write about those another time. For now I thought I’d blog about the biggest thing: church shopping. We as a 20-30 Somethings are the absolute worst when it comes to church shopping. Or, probably more appropriate, just church bashing (sometimes not even actually attending anywhere). Somewhere along the way church became a buffet to us. It became unlimited options for us to pick through and chose exactly what we want. What WE want. It seems like the part about where GOD wants us has become unimportant. (note: I am not talking about people who happen to be in-between churches, I am talking about people who have a pattern of criticizing and leaving churches.)

I was in church one Sunday morning about 3 years ago really unhappy with my church and wishing that we could attend a different one. A cooler one. God spoke to me something at that moment that seemed so base at the time but has subsequently changed my life. I sat in the balcony looking down over the congregation, irritated, frustrated and disappointed, when God said to me that He had called me to this church. He said church is like a family and in a family you can’t chose which one you will be born in to, or what your family members would be like. You may have a weird uncle or a nosy aunt. But it doesn’t matter because they are your family and you chose to love them. I was so convicted by God saying this to me, and I repented for my judgment against my church- my family. After that Sunday the flood gates opened for me and Dustin. We met amazing friends, were promoted in the church and found a true intimacy and unity at ORCC. I can say with all my heart that I love this church, and in return the church loves me. Does that mean that I don’t struggle with things here or don’t have certain desires that I would like met? No, of course not. But when in life is that not the case? This is true in my marriage as well, or in my friendships, but I don’t stop being loyal to them. If you chose to be loyal and love your church you will find the same in return. If you are cold and judgmental you will receive the same in return.

Here are 2 of the best quotes I have ever read about church shopping:

“We have reduced the church to one hour-and-a-half event per week; we have reduced the Gospel to cater to felt needs and personal preferences; and we have reduced discipleship to optional private spiritual exercises …We are raised with so many options we are paralyzed by the possibility of something better … God/church simply gets added to the list of things we consume … the problem is that much of the ‘attractional’ church has fostered this understanding by catering to it …” -Mike Erre, speaking pastor of Rock Harbor Church in Costa Mesa, Calif

“But we as individual “church shoppers” must realize there are problems with every single church. Let me repeat that: There are problems with every single church. There are lame people in every one. There is gossip in every one. There are weird, awkward people in every one. Pastors are going to screw up, the music might suck and the greeter at the door might turn her nose up at you when you enter. When these things happen, remember that none of those things matter. Do not be distracted by these things. People are always going to be flawed. That’s why they need Christ. And you know what? You are there to bring more of Him to that place. You are there to give of yourself, to humble yourself, to form relationships with people you might not normally associate with for the sake of something greater than you. Offer to apply for leadership.  Offer to help with a mission trip. Go feed homeless people. If you go with the intent to give of yourself in any and every way possible, I promise the sucky worship leader or the yawner sermons will not matter.

If we walk actively and raise our voices, we will connect. If we sit passively, expecting to be catered to, we will be left in the cold.”

source: Pastor Andrew Schwab


Filed under aiming at heaven, church stuff, i am feeling feisty., in my opionation, life questions, more like Him, right?, stuff I don't like

I am a weirdo and my cat is a sicko.

I am a bundle of contradictions. I want harmony but I find myself picking unnecessary fights. Why do I care if someone doesn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day or hates cats? I want to encourage people but I become judgmental and short. I want to have friends, see people, be social, but I make up excuses to not go out and stay home to hide. I call people back hoping I get their voicemail. I make plans and promises only to break them a couple days later.  I admire people who are patient and soft spoken, like Marie from my C.R. group. She is long-suffering and I can’t imagine anyone really annoying her. I, on the other hand, am brash and easily tripped up. There are days where every living thing annoys me. Why do I care if a person has terrible taste in music or that some people pronounce libRary libarry?

Today in our staff meeting, we were talking about a family who is going through a really hard time. My heart was feeling only mercy for them, really wanting things to change for them, but somehow those feelings traveled to my mouth and came out as judgmental and almost mean. I don’t understand it. It’s like two people live inside me, one is sweet and tenderhearted, the other is rude and impatient. Watch out, because lately it’s a gamble at which one you’ll get.

In other news- my cat drinks out of the toilet. Look at this sicko.



Filed under aiming at heaven, funny ha ha, i am feeling feisty., i love cats. so what?, in my opionation, life questions, more like Him, right?, sad stuff, stuff I don't like

a little story about coyotes

Dustin and I were driving home the other day. When traffic is really bad on I-25 we take a back way that goes through a field and pass a golf course. We were driving with fields on both sides of us and saw a coyote on the side of the road, in the middle of the day, barking and howling with his nose straight up like some Santa Fe sculpture. We were surprised to see him sitting so close to the street with lots of cars passing and even some people walking by. We slowed down a little and rolled down the window to hear him howling. We turned the corner and saw across the field another coyote walking quickly toward the howling coyote. We noticed that the coyote coming from across the filed was limping badly and couldn’t wait to get to the howling friend. We watched them reunite, licking each others faces, and they headed off together down into a ravine.

There really isn’t a point to this story. I guess I could try and spiritualize it somehow, but it would make it even more cheesy. Actually, now that I think about it, this blog post kind of sucks. I guess you had to be there.



Filed under funny ha ha, i am feeling feisty., in my opionation, Life and Marriage, Nerd Alert!, right?, sad stuff

5 o’clock shadow

Each morning I wake up, sometimes shower, get dressed, and do my hair and make up. I look in our full length mirror and say to myself, “not great, but looks pretty good.” But, it does not fail, around 3 o’clock I catch a glimpse of myself in our office mirror and think, what the heck happened to me? Why am I wearing this stupid outfit and why does my hair look like this? How could I have possibly thought I looked good when I left my house this way? Is it that the lighting in our bathroom is so fantastic that it’s like wearing beer-goggles when I look in the mirror? Or is it that I am so tired in the morning that I don’t put much thought into what looks good or not? Whatever the reason I am sitting here in retarded jeans, a wrinkly shirt and stringy hair,  having one of those days.


Filed under funny ha ha, i am feeling feisty., in my opionation, life questions, my opionion does matter, Nerd Alert!, right?, sad stuff, stuff I don't like

Incorporate the bullet point.

I know it is time to post something new on my blog. It has been a week and I still have the same Remembering Advent post. I have things tumbling around in my mind and a few of them would be good to write about. Sort-of air my thoughts out a little. The best way to do that is incorporating the use of the bullet point.

  • I have a terrible habit of using too many commas and having run-on sentences. I want to write like I talk and in my mind every time I place a period instead of a comma it interrupts the “speech” I am making. I have had a few people comment on my run-on problem and I just want to make a sincere apology to those people now since it’s probably not going to change anytime soon.

  • Dustin and I are looking into moving to Aurora from Lone Tree. Every time I watch the news it seems to have a story or two about some drive-by shooting, murder or gang related violence that just so happens to have taken place in Aurora. If Lone Tree is ever on the news it is to announce a new shopping center or future Ikea. Do you see the difference? Barnes and Noble at Park Meadows or Dollar Tree off Quincy? I don’t know if we are ready to tell people we are from Aurora. Even the people who are downtown-snobs and claim they like to live among the “needy” would think twice…
  • Aurora vs Lone Tree in pictures: aurora
  • lone_tree

  • I received Lost Season 4 from my dear mother in law for Christmas. Dustin and I got home on Friday night and finished the entire season by Sunday. It turns out I remember almost nothing from the last season so it was like watching it all new again. Because the writers strike made Season 4 shorter than the other seasons they loaded it up with some amazing special features. Why do they call John Locke Jeremy Bentham? If the island has disappeared how will the Oceanic 6 find it? Will Kate and Sawyer end up together? Is Daniel Faraday stuck on a raft with no ship or island to go to? Why didn’t Penny’s boat pick him up too? So many questions….good thing the 5th season starts on Jan. 21st. Editors note: if you haven’t ever watched Lost and you think you might like to start, at this point you might as well forget it. I can’t imagine trying to watch from Season 1. Good luck to you and sorry about the spoilers I just gave away.
  • lost_sawyer_reading

  • Yes, I am feeling feisty today.


Filed under i am feeling feisty., LOST Season 4, my opionion does matter, rad shizzz, right?